In the midst of losing a dear friend to cancer this summer, I was invited to read Jennifer Dukes Lee’s: The Happiness Dare before its August release. I adore Jennifer, and her prior book: Love Idol really touched my heart a few years back.

After Love Idol, Jennifer and I became friends and we discovered that we have a number of things in common: her husband is a farmer, she has two daughters, she once wrote for newspaper, and Jennifer loves back country roads and Jesus just like me.

Jennifer is a journalist at heart. “I used to cover crime, politics, and natural disasters as a news reporter for metropolitan daily newspapers,” says Jennifer. “Now, I use my reporting skills to chase after the biggest story ever: the redemptive story of Christ. (That’s front-page news.) I cling to the hope of a cross, and I’m passionate about sharing the Good News through story. I believe in miracles; I am one. I marvel at God’s unrelenting grace for stumbling sinners like me, who have been made whole through Christ. I believe in scandalous grace, and that the cross is the most priceless and costly gift the world has ever seen. I believe that it really is all because of Jesus.”

The Happiness Dare arrived in my inbox at just the wrong moment this summer. Or perhaps just the right moment in God’s timing because the last thing I wanted was to read a book about happiness as our friend, Billy, was dying. Yet, here’s the thing about The Happiness Dare, it isn’t full of just candy, fun, and fairy tales. Right from the get-go, Jennifer admits she isn’t always happy, and pushes the reader to be proactive in pursuing happiness just as she and her family have learned to do.

I was doing a pretty good job at pursuing happiness while reading The Happiness Dare in the wake of Billy’s passing until another friend in the prime of his life suffered a heart attack. Eight days later, on the 4th of July, this friend, Chris, died, too, leaving behind his precious wife, Nancy, and their six beautiful kids. Their youngest child is only three-years-old. Their oldest daughter, Regan, sang Let It Be at her daddy’s funeral. Chris loved the Beatles, and Regan’s song for him was stunning. Just stunning. I still haven’t recovered from hearing Regan sing for her daddy, an amazing man I never saw without a grin on his face. Nancy and I have been friends all our lives and my heart is broken for her and the children.

I’ve had other dear friends come down with cancer this summer. And the whole social, racial, and political landscape of this country makes me want to weep. How did we get here? Life can be so hard.

It just feels impossible to be happy when sadness abounds. I stopped reading The Happiness Dare in July because I just needed to breathe in and out and say my prayers and cry for awhile. The truth is, I don’t think we’re meant to be happy all the time. The Bible says there is a season for everything under heaven. “A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance,” Ecclesiastes 3:4.

I know Jennifer would agree that life comes to us in seasons, that there is a time to mourn, but I also believe Jennifer is onto something powerful with The Happiness Dare. I love how in her book she challenges the prevalent church teaching that God cares about our holiness not our happiness. When I gave my life to Christ fifteen years ago, I heard this solemn mandate, and I believed it. Holy not happy. What a way to start your Christian life. Like a brand new wife on her wedding day being told, “You won’t be happy, but you’ll be holy! The romance is over, now sweat some blood!”

The truth is, God does care about our happiness says Jennifer in The Happiness Dare, and we should care too, and do something about it. In the book there are quizzes to take and anecdotes told about happiness to help the reader learn what makes them tick when it comes to happiness. I love how Jennifer uses scripture to fuel confidence in that our Heavenly Father does want us to be happy.

I discovered by taking the book’s happiness style assessment that I am a “thinker” and quiet things like sunsets and porch swings make me happy. Maybe you’re a “doer” like Jennifer. Or a “giver” or an “experiencer” or a “relater.” I know big parties don’t make me happy. I’d much rather be home with my family or with a few close friends or alone with a good book. Jennifer writes about getting to know our happiness style and moving in that direction.

I haven’t finished The Happiness Dare yet, but I’m deep into this little blue book now, determined to pursue happiness for the rest of the summer.

For the rest of my life.

This past weekend after our Saturday farmers market, Scott and I took a trip to research my next historical romance novel set in 1849 San Francisco. We didn’t know Sunday was the morning of the San Francisco marathon until we got to the city. It took us a very long time to get over the Golden Gate Bridge with all the marathon traffic, but from the bridge, I looked out the car window at all the sailboats in the harbor, reminding myself I love sailboats. And I love slow Sunday drives with my husband. And I love cold, foggy weather when it’s a 105 degrees in the valley, and we’ve been farming in that heat all week. We crawled over the Golden Gate with our windows rolled down. It was a lovely experience.

Sometimes we have to rewire our brains and remind ourselves of all the things that make us happy in life. Pursuing happiness isn’t a sin. It’s a God-given gift and there are ways to find happiness even when life brings heartache and pain.

You can pick it up The Happiness Dare on Amazon. Or probably just about any bookstore. I dare you to read this little blue book. Let’s pursue happiness together.