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THE LAMB

A week ago I am driving in the car with our 13 year old son when I decide to brave the sex talk. It has come to my attention that our junior higher doesn’t know much about the birds and bees. Down deep this pleases me, that we’ve done a decent job sheltering our son. Confident I can answer any question from a boy who isn’t quite sure how babies are made, I boldly say, “Ask me anything, honey. Whatever you want to know I will tell you.” After briefly assuring him with my eyes, I look out the window at the sheep along […]

By Paula April 22, 2011

Fires and Strawberry Jam

With winter passing I realize how much I’ve been loved… each morning my husband has made a fire for me, before he showers, before his coffee, before the sun comes up. He pads from our bed, down the cold hall, past three of our sleeping sons sharing one room, out the door to the woodpile where he fills his arms with heavy logs. The kindling must be chopped too, the hatchet steady in his hand, steady the way he is under the morning moon. It’s 5:30 a.m. I can’t remember the last time he gave me flowers. Or a card. […]

By Paula April 6, 2011

MERCY IS IN THE HOUSE

Sunday afternoon I am driving down the road when I see my neighbor teaching his grandson how to ride a bike. It is a perfect spring day. The sun shines on my neighbor’s thinning hair and on the golden hair of the grandchild. Along the road almond trees bloom. In the distance snow-covered mountains look as close as my backyard. As I watch my neighbor push the little red bike, balanced on training wheels, the grandchild grinning for all his worth, I suddenly and profoundly feel God’s presence. It’s a heavenly moment until the Lord whispers, “Beloved, you are angry […]

By Paula April 4, 2011

Little Feet

The other morning I was half asleep when I heard the patter of little feet down the hall. The sun was on the rise and so was three-year-old Garry James. The last thing I wanted was to get out of bed. I’d just gotten the baby back asleep and was hoping Garry would sleep longer so I could rest too. No such luck. Soon Garry was hollering for his milk and a movie. I crawled out of bed reminding myself that someday those little feet would grow up and walk away. Gratefulness guards the heart so The sound of little […]

By Paula March 28, 2011

Little Faith and the Faithfulness of God

Last spring I’d just returned home from a writers’ conference and was all geared up to pursue a long dreamed of writing career when Scott informed me that he wanted another baby. This declaration from my husband upended my plans considering long ago I discovered that I’m not good at writing and having babies simultaneously. It seems all the blood goes to growing the baby, then caring for the little creature, and my brain stops working. Then it takes several years to find my mind again so I can write after bambino arrives. It’s not that I was against another […]

By Paula March 17, 2011

A Glimpse of Heaven

Last night I caught a glimpse of heaven. This happened while I prayed with my son Luke. Up until that evening with Luke the day had been really sad for me. That morning a special friend died. She’d battled cancer for a number of years and a handful of times I prayed with her, asking Jesus to conquer the cancer. A year ago I stood with this friend at the altar of our church as the pastor anointed her with oil. I profoundly felt the presence of God then as we pleaded with the Lord for her healing. Few times […]

By Paula February 22, 2011

Way Giver

God sometimes speaks to me through children’s movies. On a recent afternoon in the middle of Kung Fu Panda, a favorite Bicknell boys flick, God showed me my sinful tendacy to be a “way getter” instead of a “way giver.” This happened primarily during the scene where the wise old turtle Master Ooway is blowing out candles. There are thousands of candles and the old turtle is barely moving each wick with his soft breath. Master Shifu, the little red panda who reminds me of myself because of his impatience, can’t stand the wait of all those candles, so he […]

By Paula February 17, 2011