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HOMESICK

Why has election day left me homesick? I miss my grandparents today. Miss sitting in their kitchen watching Grandma roll up the top of her white, cast iron stove to cook the noon meal. In high school, I would drive to their house wrapped by peach orchards when the crowded high school halls closed in, when kids I didn’t know pressed into my space, pressed into my spirit. My grandparents were everything safe and steady, a home of rules and manners and rural life rhythms. You cleaned your plate, and pulled your weight, and waved to Pops when he drove […]

By Paula November 6, 2012

Seeing God in the Storm

Before Hurricane Sandy hit, I noticed on facebook some East Coast folks making light of the coming storm. They’ve never suffered a natural disaster. They have no idea what the weather may unleash on them in the coming hours, was all I could think. Born and raised in a river valley, I have known floods firsthand. My parents (thirteen-year-olds in 1955), nearly lost their lives after a mighty storm blew out a river levee near their neighborhood on Christmas Eve night. In 1986, when I was a teenager, another Pineapple Express (as these drenching rains from the Hawaiian Islands are […]

By Paula October 31, 2012

When Dreams Become Reality

Oscar Wilde wrote: “In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.”I consider this as I walk upstairs to put the finishing touches on our guest room. A soft, fluffy blanket I spread at the foot of the duvet. A framed photo of Cami and Drew’s wedding, I prop on a bookshelf. Lacy’s maid-of-honor bouquet, I hang on the antique wardrobe; the dried roses and hydrangeas one of the few belongings Lacy hasn’t packed to her new apartment. After straightening the room, I sit down on the bench […]

By Paula October 24, 2012

JESUS and Lake Tahoe

I used to know someone who would talk up Jesus all the time. She would boast about her “close walk with the Lord” go into great detail about “the visions Jesus gave her,” and freely and confidently give “God advice” to everyone else. Problem was, her Jesus and my Jesus didn’t always see eye to eye. Being a relatively new believer back then, devouring my Bible to know Jesus better, I just didn’t understand how this could be, especially coming from a person I considered a mature Christian. Truth be told, Her Jesus was a lot nicer than my Jesus. Not more […]

By Paula October 16, 2012

The Farming of a Family

We put in the walnut trees the week before the wedding. Thousands of sticks tucked row after row in river bottom dirt. It takes faith to plant an orchard; faith to grow a family. Trusting in God and the seasons, sun and rain, joy and sorrow, reaping and sowing: these laws of life that never leave us.Yesterday, I talked with a woman married a long while. We smiled over the fits and starts and endless unfolding of our walk as wives and mothers.She has a beautiful family, four grown children succeeding in this world, a husband well-respected and well-known from […]

By Paula October 9, 2012

DISCIPLINE

Training a man child is no easy thing. This dawned on me when our oldest son peed in my face as I changed his diaper in the middle of our first night home from the hospital after his birth. That warm stream welcoming me to “boy world” shocked me wide awake. I’ve been wide-eyed ever since in this raising of boys. And with each son it has grown more eye-opening. There is certainly strength in numbers: the more boys, the more bravado, hair-brained shenanigans, and downright baloney. Not to mention an abundance of sin. The other morning in the mist of one […]

By Paula October 3, 2012

TRUST

When I was a little, bitty girl my Grandma Helen would prop me on a pillow on the front of her saddle and off we’d go. She rode a fast moving Tennessee Walking horse named Reno and in those days, Reno took my grandma and me over the mountains and through the woods and never did it dawn on me we might have been in danger. Grandma trusted Reno, and I trusted Grandma, and our rides brimmed over with joy and enthusiasm.I think back on these horse rides with Grandma as I mow the lawn with Cruz in my lap. […]

By Paula September 26, 2012