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Your Cheatin’ Heart

Hank Williams and first wife Audrey Sheppard. I first heard the song in my grandparents’ living room. Hank Williams’s Your Cheatin’ Heart, written about his ex-wife, skyrocketed to number one, selling over a million records in 1953 after Williams’s untimely death on New Year’s Day that year. The round, vinyl records swirled on a record player behind my grandparents’ couch in the 1970’s, but there was no cheatin’ going on at their house. My grandpa was a farmer, my grandma a farmer’s wife. Their kitchen was warm, full of home-cooked meals, and good, old common sense. The news on their one TV in […]

By Paula October 10, 2014

My friend, lay it down

We were young, wild, and free, or so we thought. We could smell the wet leaves on campus, autumn rains washing away our regret, or so we thought. You really liked him, and he seemed so nice, so into you, or so we thought. But college life was like that when we were young and wild and free. All these new ideas about the world, ourselves, about those boys becoming men. Forget our parents. Forget our churches. Forget our God. We became our own little goddesses. Casting off the rules. Casting off our clothes. Casting off the guilt. College was […]

By Paula October 5, 2014

How to feel safe in an unsafe world

I keep thinking I need to read less of the news and more of my Bible. Ebola, ISIS, Enterovirus D68 (causing kids to experience respiratory distress and polio-like symptoms), these headlines make the world seem more dangerous than ever. But is it? The truth is war and epidemics have raged since the beginning of time. My great-grandmother Josephine, a pretty woman from a wealthy Los Angeles family, died from the Spanish flu. Half her children perished with her. My Grandpa John, three-years-old at the time in the City of Angels, survived this pandemic, but never had a full head of hair […]

By Paula October 3, 2014

Rare Bird

I usually don’t write book reviews… Actually, I’ve never written a book review. But maybe I should from time to time. When a story hits you between the eyes it’s hard not to think about it. Talk about it. Write about it. Every mother should read this book. But many won’t. And here’s why: this is every mother’s nightmare come true. But I found great comfort in this story because God was there. Hope was there. Love was there. It makes this book well worth reading. It’s a masterpiece on motherhood. Every mom I know will relate to this story. […]

By Paula September 29, 2014

Whole

You can’t put autumn leaves back on a tree. And you can’t heal your broken self. Even when you have all the pieces. When you glue so carefully. Sit so prayerfully. You. Just. Can’t. Do. It. You can’t fix yourself. Like the summer Scott cut Luke and John’s hair. A daddy shaving two little boys down to the skin. Young brothers staring at each other in shock. It was eight-year-old Luke’s idea. A friend. A movie. Who knows what prompted Luke to ask for a buzz. Three-year-old John wanting to look just like his brother until all that red hair […]

By Paula September 22, 2014

When A Man Loves A Woman

He was a boy and I was a girl and under a full moon he tried to kiss me. Who kisses a girl on the first date? Not even a date, this I-want-to-get-to-know-you-so-I-came-to-this-party-but-I’m-not-ready-to-kiss-you night when I knew, deep down knew, this boy was for me. So three years later, I married him. And ten years after that, I wanted a divorce. Three cute kids, a four bedroom house, and two SUVs later I wanted a divorce because marriage got hard. And divorce appeared easy. Not really easy, but easier than being married to hard. To make this long story short, […]

By Paula September 15, 2014

Potty Training isn’t for Pansies, Happy Labor Day Moms!

He actually fell asleep this way. Must be the rigors of potty-training. I feel like burying my head in the couch too right now. This is the fifth boy I’ve potty-trained, and let me tell you, it’s not for the faint of heart. It’s like training a bobcat to use the toilet. I’ve put off this training longer than my other boys because Cruz is so hard. Every child milestone has been tough with this kid. The past few days, I’ve locked us both in the bathroom when I know it’s time. Cruz then runs in circles holding his butt […]

By Paula September 1, 2014