“For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh” Ephesians 5:31.

In honor of Valentine’s Day, I looked up this verse in the Bible expecting to find it in the Old Testament, which I did, Genesis 2:24. I also found it listed in Matthew 19:5 and Mark 10:7-8 of the New Testament.

Malachi 2:15 also deals with this text. You cry out, “Why doesn’t the LORD accept my worship?” I’ll tell you why! Because the LORD witnessed the vows you and your wife made when you were young. But you have been unfaithful to her, though she remained your faithful partner, the wife of your marriage vows.

Proverbs 2:17 speaks to the wayward wife: “who has left the partner of her youth and ignored the covenant she made before God.”

God sees marriage as a covenant not just between a husband and wife, but a covenant binding a married person to the LORD. When we break our marriage vows, we break a covenant with God.

The last thing God wants us to do is break a covenant with Him. Nobody longs for your marriage to last more than God. God made the heavens and the earth. God parted the Red Sea and delivered his people out of Egypt. Don’t you think God can deliver you from divorce?

Fourteen years ago, I wanted a divorce. In fact, I told Scott this with tears streaming down my face one day. He stood there in the doorway of our lovely, two-story home in his green Army flightsuit staring at me like I’d just told him a zoo was on our roof. For a man who could fly a multi-million dollar aircraft– a Blackhawk helicopter– I thought he was beyond stupid. The elephant of our evaporating marriage filled the room.

“I’ve been telling you for months that I’m done with us. I can’t live this way anymore. I’m dying inside in this #$%&* marriage.”

“Well, you can go and live by your %$#&* self. If you walk out this door, you leave here on your own. You are not taking our kids out of this %$#&* house.”

We both cussed in those days, and had three small children. There was no way I was going to leave without my kids. So I spent nearly a year trying to take them with me. Scott stopping me at every turn. My husband even humored me, buying me “flyaway gear” a small, leather suitcase for the nights I slept on my bachelor brother’s couch across town when Scott was home from his endless, Army missions. After the kids fell asleep, I’d walk out the door, and return by dawn so our children didn’t know I’d been gone.

I tell you this because I’ve been in a messed up marriage. I know the pain it brings. The absolute heartache of broken love. But I also know God is near to the brokenhearted.

Because I was heartbroken, I reached out for God with everything I had. A weary, wounded wife falling into the everlasting arms. And He healed me. And within a few years, healed my marriage. Now twenty-four years married with seven children, my life is something I never dreamed possible. All because of God.

If you are struggling in your marriage right now, don’t give up. See yourself married to Jesus. In a covenant with God. Ask the LORD to keep this marriage covenant for you. Ask Him to make your marriage everything He wants it to be. Then obey Him. Read your Bible and do what the Good Book says. Lay down your life. Carry the cross in your marriage. Walk out your marriage one step at a time trusting God to restore for you the years the locust have eaten, Joel 2:25.

Let God be your Valentine. Embrace His overwhelming, unconditional love for you and share that love with your spouse.